Monthly Archives: September 2016

Transportation Woes

Ethan will never drive a car. Ever again.

Occasionally, you might hear a story of a person with Down syndrome with a drivers license. I am happy for them and their parents, but I feel that when a story like that is publicized, it sends a message to parents and the general population that is faulty. I know that it is meant to be encouraging, but the way I work it out, it’s like telling the parents of a typical newborn, “You know, I heard that some of these kids become US Olympians”. I did the math. Similar results. Even if it is possible for a tiny handful of people, it is not a practical probability for most. If you add in all the other folks with intellectual disabilities and adults with autism, you have a whole lot of people who need rides to get to their destinations.

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What’s Wrong?

Only just about everything.

Ethan’s transition into ‘adult life’ has been nothing like I anticipated. It is has been so much harder, slower and fraught with roadblocks than I could have foreseen. Thank God. I am glad I didn’t know – similar to how I am glad I did not know that he would be born with an extra chromosome.

I have noticed that my frustration and disappointment is not well-met by people asking how Ethan is doing. They want to know that he is busy & happy. They want to hear that there are lots of ‘programs’ for adults with disabilities. They want to hear ‘He’s good, thanks!’ I have not complied with their desires. I’ve bitched, moaned, and complained. I have been honest. People haven’t enjoyed that. I can tell by the looks of disgust on their faces. Most people tell me that I must be ‘missing something’. Unlike them, I am not comforted by this thought, because I know that I am not.

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